Monday, October 18, 2010

Whoops, I goofed

It seems in my infinite wisdom I was being a bad host. I'm used to multiply what can I say and ANYBODY who has a multiply account will tell you when you get responses, they pop up on your main interface when you first sign in. So here I am looking at my dashboard seeing no alerts(which is of course because I have no comment moderation on who knew) and thinking okay basic boring blog nobody is out there reading. So I delve a little closer into my profile today to see why it is that my blog doesn't always show up to the people looking for me. And low and behold what do I see, why that people have been talking at me for a while now. Probably think I'm a great big doody head too because I never so much as gave them a hello(what part of no cursing, the A-team blog got a pass because well BA is BA and you can kiss it stuffy pencil pushing types).

Now that I understand how blogger does comments I promise to check for them more often in the future. Hell I have some pretty knowledgeable responders Sope(you know how you say that weird non word it's like you were just gonna say so but at a P at the end of it, just me oh well) I will be paying more attention to the comments tab in the future Mea Culpa, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it look ma 3 blogs in 2 days.  I appreciate all those who have come 3 (way more than I had imagined as I really hadn't talked about much of anything) and again feel free to drop me a line anytime hell you feel I'm waaay off on something I say thats why the comments are open you don't even have to sign in with your blogger account if you feel you need anonymity, use it.

Ta ta for now I think this might be close to the record for my SHORTEST BLOG EVER, woo hoo. Tweet ya later

Nice guys: a revisiting pt. 1

Waaaay back in January I wrote a blog This one now in that blog I did my little lament about why it sucks being a nice guy. And it still does, trust me it really does. Then a few weeks ago a friend @tracyreneejones wrote an article on the blog IoM&R (which is one of my favorites by the way, I love the various topics from political commentary to social issues in the various minority communities, it's run by the always passionate @rippdemup a fellow memphian and good online buddy) which struck a few cords for a multitude of reasons, it was about abusive black men and how they treat black women now as I am wont to do, I mentioned a few disagreements I had with some of the premises in the blog. And as usual I got some of what is a typical mistreated females response, one of which is untrue. I know exactly how it feels to be harassed when walking down a hallway getting unwanted attention from people you either barely know or really don't feel like interacting with.

Little thing about thinking ONLY you have had a hard life, you don't realize when you are pissing in someone else's face. Now this would be a great time for an anecdote about how and why I completely understand how the women feel sometimes, thing is I don't feel like sharing it. See part of the reason I am so patient, compassionate and comforting is because I understand, that leaves us a little problem though. If your entire stance towards me is that you should be as aggressive as possible because I won't see the stupidity of some people, that I will not understand the pain of being verbally accosted, physically assaulted, and preyed upon by groups of people you have done nothing to. Then when I try to explain to you a solution all you are going to do is treat me like something you stepped in. Which will bring out the less than nice side of me, again being nice is a choice, a hard life choice because if you look around at the world "nice guys" don't last that long. This isn't marvel or dc. There are no super heroes, when you come to the rescue people rarely remember that past you pulling their buns out the fire. So if you push Mr. nice, Mr. Compassionate, Mr. Professional one time too many the guy who has been pushed many times through out his life, spit on, and belittled wakes up.

People don't just target you for teasing because you are of the opposite sex. They don't just target you for aggressive interaction if they find you attractive. They target anyone they feel is weak or vulnerable. Now yes WOMEN for the most part have that stereotype stamped on them at birth, but if you are shorter, skinnier, fatter, taller, you have a slightly abnormal feature well away we go. Though we lie to ourselves (and our children) when we get older about how the world is, and what it takes to get along in this world, the truth that would set us free is pounded into our heads on a regular basis. Ladies and gentleman "Bullying" the new hot political topic of this cycle isn't new, women being treated as sexual objects, nor intelligent people being ridiculed, nor attractive people being thought of as air heads. Sexual orientation, non existent,  high or hyper sexual desires, quirks, eccentricities, abnormalities you name it the world has seen it before.

The issue is, because we like to pretend that it USED to be so great, we fail to fix the problems we already know are there. As I said it sucks being a nice guy because when you try to NICELY inform people of a better way to do something, you are going to get attacked. Then as you try and civilly maintain a discourse with them of course as they THINK they see weakness they pounce. And when they pounce just like anything else in nature if they were not correct in their assessment of the situation they leave themselves open, and survival of the fittest demands you attack this unprepared soul.

I like being a nice guy because I think it makes my mother proud, I think when my aunts and cousins see me they think wow thats a pretty good guy we are related to. Now no they don't know everything about me, they aren't privy to my love of large reared women, or pornography(or at least I hope my mom isn't that would be creepy), erotic literature, how deep the depths of my curiosity goes, or how cold I can be. So the "my mother/other matriarchal figure thinks I'm blank" defense is not to about be used. Now I personally think I am a guy they would be proud to meet in the streets some where. While not physically with me now, I would like to hope my wife thinks back to our many years together and says "while he has his faults, my husband tried to be the best man he could no matter how hard the situation". Would be a great time to mention how proud my dad is of me, but in truth we butt heads more often then we heap praises on each other. I think we have the stereotypical male relationship I love him, he loves me but you know what that dude right there pisses me off(I am speaking as both of us right now I'm sure I piss him off with the way I try to weigh all sides and approach a problem with different angles being discussed before hand. And I so LOOOOVE the way he just looks at a problem says what he thinks will work and walks away.) and he needs to remember who I am.

I would like to think that while when we were all together and still developing into the people we would become that those who went to high school with me saw a young man who wished to give more to the people around him than he wanted to destroy or take. My harsh tongue was developed under their unyielding tutelage, my thick skin tanned to perfection by their dislike of the weakness they saw in my heart because I wanted to be me and not just like them. And that me was someone who could be your friend even if it wasn't popular, who could work together with you even if socially we didn't get along, and could speak with you civilly even if just moments before harsh words had been exchanged if the current moment required cooperation and concentration. Thing is, for now that is not normal oh no! If I don't like you then every second I am around you I'm supposed to make it my SOLE FOCUS to make your life miserable and make people take sides. I'm supposed to be irresponsible with my actions, unthinking with my interaction and ignorant of my responsibilities to the group and situation I may be involved in. Hey I've got a rectum like anyone else and if it is feces or mud slinging time trust me I have nice sized hands we can get the party started(you would not believe how much mental yoga it took to create that statement without an expletive slipping out, and I've been drinkin how ya like me now).

I was the lone wolf when younger, the cub moved from his pack to be added into a new one, surrounded by those who's initiation rituals he had not been privy too, who's defining moments he had not be there for. Who's hierarchies he did not yet know, armed only with a "be nice to people" and "treat people how you want to be treated" mentality I walked into the lions den with no armor on. I mean we're all kids right? It's supposed to be fun and games and learning right? Why do I need armor, I'm gonna come in here and get to know everybody and we'll probably become friends or at least most of us will.

Except you don't get that same love of just walking in the door to warm faces when they have no clue who you are. They don't know your mom makes the bomb peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, or that she makes those gooey chocolate chip cookies from scratch that you love and SOMETIMES will be willing to share(what I love chocolate chip cookies so eat me). That you had some nice toys you would love to share with them, well but you guys live sooo far away and I can't walk to your house(YET) and my parents get home so late from work in this commuter society. So for the longest my classmates were not my neighbors and as such I stayed the perennial outsider far longer than was normal. Oh I did make some friends, but I made far more tormentors kids can be cruel and I learned that early, my big hearted tail who's eyes would gush at any moment because I could feel someone else's pain(I still remember my SNAPPING turtle who I was crying because it bit my finger but bawled louder when my cousin shot the poor turtle for biting me) was not ready for those who just saw my friendliness as something to be exploited.

Okay that's a SEMI anecdote, wasn't planning on it but the sake' had other ideas. Anyway as I come forward in life I realize okay no people really DON'T treat people how they want to be treat, and they aren't really nice. But you know what I kind of like it, yes I earned plenty of scars, welts and bruises trying to be THAT guy, you know the one willing to swim against the current because well IT'S GOING SO FAST BECAUSE OF THE WATERFALL, or it's going so fast because nobody has stopped to look where we are going, it's they are going that way and well I guess we should be going that way. Well most of the time I didn't want to go that way, things people were scared to admit they liked, you know what you don't like me no damn way and I do like that. "Nah that ain cool to me, no I don't want to try, sure I can help you carry it, but nope no thanks I don't need it."

Another thing, maybe you don't have anything that I want or else don't have what the service I provided you with is worth meh let me go on because I really did get more out of it than you did. I did something nice and have the memory of it, BUT YOU have this lasting memory of that scrawny, stocky, tubby chocolate kid who helped you out for no reason at all. And it will probably be stuck in your head for a minute, or maybe you scream SUCKAAAAAAH the second you think I'm out of earshot(which is a lot farther than you think) and feel you got over, only to not have anybody to help you take it back when you get done and thus have that lasting feeling of damn I wish somebody else was as nice as that guy. I've got a LOUSY memory, but it gets better the further out from the incident we go(yup weird like that I know) but leaving a good impression means by the time I do remember it, most likely in your mind the grace with which I acted will be exaggerated and I'll seem even nicer than I really am.

There's still this thing though, I am the guy who took all those lumps to get here, which means I probably have a chip or two stuck to my shoulder pounded in over the years for not being exactly like the pride after leaving the pack. It also means that I have more than one pattern by which I can attack you OR the problem. And again, who respects a nice guy huh, yup nobody which means if I have made it this far I must not have a problem getting dirty when the need arises. Hell getting dirty I must not have a problem increasing the depth of the pit. Remember I'm the odd one out here, I'm the respectful one to start, I'm the one NOT going along with everyone else which also means I'm the first target. To stand out is to stand alone until you find others with similarities to you and the go along to get along or else not be the target folks are many, they strike quickly as not to have their loyalties doubted, and they strike hard because otherwise they may be seen as becoming weak and thus a target to be whipped back into shape by the herd they are a part of.

I plopped a part one on the back of this, I think I'm gonna stop here and come back on a different post to finish. editing time woohoo

Sunday, October 17, 2010

It's just stuff

I'll admit it, I do like my stuff. I'm the oldest and since my little sister was like 3 the concept of me having something of my own was like foreign to me. From the first time she took my toy robot and said "mine" just because while she didn't know why I was playing with it or what distant world me and my mind were on I had made that robot look like the greatest toy on the planet. To me it was, I have a great imagination I may never be satisfied with the way it transfers from my minds eye, through my fingers to whatever medium I am putting it on but that is because my mental pictures are so vivid. Hell even my tongue can't keep up with me half the time and as you see these key strokes and the average length of my submissions I'm sure you think he's exaggerating:but I'm not.

I was piloting that robot off to help han solo and luke skywalker stop the super star destroyer from killing the ewoks. Or maybe I was outside helping scottie get those dilithium crystals stabilized. I never know, my mind races along so fast that if mentally I blink I'm in a whole new world. And it is probably because I'm the oldest and thus subject to sharing my material possessions with every one else that I am so narcissistic about my mental possessions. They have to be perfect because if I am sharing it with you I want you to understand how precious it is and how wonderful.

My mental possessions though are  not the reason I am writing this blog. I lost something today, hell it is mine in name only I had long since bequeathed it to the pot because well my room is not as large as it used to be and honestly my TV would not have fit in here. So while out at a job site returning somebody's computer my LCD tv was cracked. Now anybody who owns an LCD device knows you never know how bad the damage is until you turn it on. And yes it's bad you can't even see anything on the screen it's only one small corner thats cracked but it seems the WHERE is the most important factor in this because instead of being a spiderweb sitting in the middle of the picture we just got a huge web and running flashy color. Now I won't lie 20 years ago I would have been pissed. Pissed actually is an understatement what I paid for that TV when I bought it MAAAAAAN, Remember the lovely Madeline Kahn(I think thats how you spell it) from all those Mel Brooks movies and Clue, clue is the important one in this instance remember how she described the feeling when she found out her husband had been cheating on her. Yeah that and a conniption fit are just the tip of the ice berg of what I would be feeling. Because once again when big brother shared and turned his back for a minute: snap, crick, chink, smash, boom, ZZZZZT, crackle. Oh yes don't think it was just GI Joe's with the Kung Fu grip(okay technically I never owned a REAL GI Joe with said kung fu grip, I had them miniaturized knock offs fine they were the real thing but I wanted the full size one, just like I wanted the millenium falcon or the ORIGINAL Optimus Prime Big rig, granted I'd be doing life right now if I had gotten either of those out the box and I came home to find them broken) I'm a kid of the original analog to digital transition. You ever see pictures of those old apple 2's yep I first started playing on those with all the other grade schoolers. Had an Atari 2600 too, and the 7800(my god sister had the 5200 with the original BIG BRICK CATRIDGES) I have lived through the creation of EVERY gaming generation so far. I never owned ET but I played that in store demo so when I tell you thank god for land fills, trust me I'm not kidding. ET the video game is a level of suck NEVER to be experienced again.

Even The Last Airbender didn't ET the video game us, did he try yes. But as he got SOME things right I can't call him ET the movie maker(but MAN did he try) now that was 20 years ago, that would be about the christmas we rolled home to find our house had been robbed, Happy birthday to me(my birthday is christmas eve yes I share my birthday with the happiest day in every childs life, that day Santa comes to make their dreams come true). We learned quite a few lessons that year. And yes for a while I was the Troll under the bridge, if parents were not around touching my stuff got the evil eye and a swift pop on the hand. Especially if it was something that wasn't age appropriate for you anyway. I think it took for my little brother to start playing baseball for me to be more mellow about my stuff.

Huh why would a sibling playing a sport make you more open with your stuff. It was a Louisevill Slugger 36. I loved it, that bad boy was the first brand new bat I had ever bought for myself all the rest had been from flea markets or yard sales(and hey I will NEVER down flea market bats or yard sale gloves already broken in leather is hard to pass up). So anyway again my brothers would watch me and my friends play and they would see us having fun granted both are double digit years younger than me. But hey older brother and his friends are out there enjoying themselves can we play. Sure whatever go chase the balls when they fly way out.(nice part about my old neighborhood on elm street up the block and over the tracks was a baseball field we actually had two within child transportation level distance ie walking or a bike ride). Now both had basketball courts attached and other enjoyable amenities but the baseball field is the important part. I am a firm believe in playing baseball like you know how to play baseball. Go down to the wire, you can't hit my best pitch, you can't get that over the plate past me baseball.  And thats how I taught it to my brothers, you want me to pitch to you no lobs uh uh your gonna hit a real pitch. And call me a purist but I like WOOD hickory or ash if you please. So there we are J just started his little league older brother went all out, bought 4 brand new balls each weekend so that when we played on the field real leather was flying. So as we are getting ready I pitch to him to let him build up a little arm strength, and being a younger sibling you know what he goes for yup the 'Ville. Dude I love ya given time you MIGHT be taller than me(unfortunately life loves irony scratch might out of there and put in DEFINITELY) but thats is way to much bat for you. He he I can hear life to this day "you of all people are telling YOUR little brother HE CAN'T". I made him a deal he could get a few swings with the hickory and if he couldn't get it around to make CONTACT, he'd pick up the lighter aluminum to continue practicing. I can still see that brightening smile on his face, I was being a douche I knew he wasn't gonna make contact especially on that first day. And no he didn't but the determination he showed(especially as the bat did more swinging of him then he did of it that first time) kinda filled an older brother with pride. I probably should have only given him 1 at bat worth of swings but I let him go ahead and miss 9 pitches(not in a row I've never had that kinda control on my pitches). He got tired picked up the aluminum and made contact with a few.

Now being that he failed of course he would give up right(hey life, I will kick you in the nads, seriously it's been like 18 years or so quit laughing, punk grrr) Nope not my little brother, it took him like 2 or 3 weeks but he made contact. didn't go far but that Thunk! when leather hits wood got him hooked too. Unfortunately I didn't know how hooked he made contact a few times, then he actually started getting dribble hits then decent past the pitchers mound hits(what I told you it's baseball you are either gonna hit a pitch or sit down) I even had some of my friends pitching to him. One day (I worked so I never made his games) I get a phone call the coach would like you to stop letting your little brother bring your bat to the games. PAUSE first off little so and so when you ASK to borrow my bat, second off how the hell did you get so good at putting it back. Problem was this was a few weeks in and before the game where the coach relented LIKE I HAD and decide "Hell let the kid swing the bat, get embarrassed and learn his lesson". Yeah um Coach next time ask me, I would have told you not only can he swing that bat, but unless you got a kid on the other side with an arm like a 16+ year olds he don't stand a CRACK! See the kid I heard tried the slider. Or at least at his age a baby slider, problem is Old J Kirk he loves to throw sliders, and high fastballs (I shall have my revenge, but they are soo pretty). At the time Joel was probably 16 or 17 and J had made connections with a few of his sliders. So not only did he know what a slider looked like he also knew the outcome if he made contact. Even more if he shifted his weight behind the contact, and better still if he got more than just the tip of the bat on the ball.

See the nice thing about aluminum besides that TINK! is that the ball kinda bounces hard off the bat. and the bad thing about aluminum is that the ball bounces hard off the bat. You loose a lot of power making that tink, oh yes all that vibration that means the bat not the ball absorbed a lot of that force. So: young kid throws a slider, and a kid of similar age using a wooden bat and you know what that spells on a kiddie field right, no oh I forgot you pain in the butt sore loser parents changed the game so you wouldn't have to give a pep talk and actually PRACTICE with your kid and share some BONDING TIME. Okay fine THAT ladies and gentleman spells HOME RUN, yes I Mr. High fast ball chaser himself(I'll chase a middle one and an outside one too but as the saying goes "Starts High STAYS high") had told him you see a slider coming lean into it and watch it sail, And sale it did and Lil J was allowed to keep using that wooden bat(though with a noogied shoulder, next time ask BEFORE you borrow my bat) and keep getting those extra base hits. Hmm if I show them how to appreciate my stuff they would take considerably better care of it(that boy kept that bat in good shape while he used it, never had to wipe a lick of dirt off it he was so mad when I broke it, what I swing hard as hell too you know I've broken a few bats in my day). So I decided instead of hoarding MAYBE I should show them the value of taking care of it.

So thats what I started doing, oh it didn't always work out for the best but as they got older they got better. We are still all human beings though and accidents they do happen, so here we are we're all grown and my 5 year old LCD is busted, meh damn needed a new TV  anyway this one was showing its age, yes mildly pissed but the former brat(my baby brother) did call me first himself to let me know, gotta respect that. Off top. unforced. HE called me, second its a TV I can get a newer better one for a quarter of the price I paid for that one. Now he's sulking, which you know okay yeah he's gonna have to shell out some green backs, just not buy himself he has two brothers we ain gonna let the homey go out solo like that.  But again he was a man and spot up when he screwed up, and it's just a TV, hell it was a 5 year old LCD TV those things don't live as long as those old panel TV's did you should read the number of HOURS each of your colors is supposed to be good for, I think most tv's blues are supposed to run out in about 5-6 years worth of use.

So is this about my journey as a person, nope it's about a simple fact, it's just stuff. Something that has traveled a few addresses with me, I've enjoyed my time with and I will have no problem replacing with something newer, shinier and with more bells and whistles. Because a lot of things have and continue to change in this past 5 years, and baby VIVA LA DIFFERENCE

Friday, October 15, 2010

What is it about me lately

Every time and I do mean EVERY time for the last year and a half that I have said okay I am going to start blogging more, make an actual blog saying I am gonna blog more. Make a plan to blog more hell actually go out and do things to blog about. Do I get home, play a few browser games(look at my blogger dashboard), maybe go plop in front of the TV or Gaming system(come back look at my blogger dashboard), bring up a browser window to view porn(and while it is queing up look at my blogger dashboard), even just sit in my chair and veg(like I was doing for a good portion of the night with my sore throat) do I not just click the new post button and type SOMETHING. What did I do today, I went to east Bumble MS, got told a tall tale, or a short tale, a whopper or a minnow about what went wrong.

Or I stretched Line A to point C, around the bend and back again twisted on an end or two and viola bubkiss (is it bub kiss or bup kiss I always forget) nothing happens I always love that occurrence. And who knows who walks through the door. So I always have material, even as of  late I have a sore throat, a monster sore throat really it ate my normal sore throat for breakfast with it's scratchy toes, and I lean back cough up a little phlegm(even the spelling of the word is nasty looking) and sit up quickly nope not hitting that new post button. (okay I did it this time doesn't mean I'm gonna hit the publish post button), I mean I have been to the A and back since my last blog entry(which was in august), now yes no laptop means I am less likely to be able to type up random thoughts as I traipse through various bergs either in the passenger seat or just kicking back doing a long distance reload. I realize now that it caused me to be more prolific because I could pound away in bed(yup I had to let that innuendo laced reference go), sit at the console, just be anywhere not stuck in my cave of solace but no privacy and still be connected to the World Wide.

I mean I tweet more, mostly flirtation a few political comments the odd sarcastic whimsey here and there(really spell check Whimsical is in your list but whimsey is not FOR SHAME) mainly because it is easier to access twitter ala my smart phone then it is to blog, at the moment. I'm sure if I was HIGHLY motivated to do it I could bang out a rather short utterance here and there. But what about ANY post I have ever done here or on any other blog every Screamed SHORT UTTERANCE to you. Hmm I wonder if I'm compensating for a limited vocabulary or a lack of speaking outlets. Anyway okay YAY I did it chalk one up for the man with the randomosity plan. I might be back, might not be back(stolen from an LL cool jay song of course I'll be back nobody else blogs on this page but ME) so til then just like the old jingle "Our name is our address) Primal signing off

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Quick shot

On my way to the bus station, it is vacation time and I have a beautiful chocolate surprise waiting for me when I hit the ATL tomorrow morning. I hope all have a great weekend, if I find a way I will blog more on my trip hell I may even try foursquare(actually I think I'll sign up for it right now) it will give me something to do.

Wish me safe travels, and I wish you the same. I should have done one or two blogs earlier but I was procrastinating will do them later. Good night and atl see you in the morning

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Avatar:The last Airbender

See I would talk about The Last Airbender but the aka for that movie is how to completely suck at making a movie and completely waste everyones time. There are people who are giving this movie a chance because they just like seeing a character on screen but to say this movie sucked is an insult to sucky movies. I mean most of those movies the people actually tried their best but honestly there were way too many holes in said story to gain the audiences attention or hearts.

I think The last Airbender is going to make money, it's going to make money due to the "Howard Stern rule", what is that you ask, simply put the people who love Howard listen to hear what he is gonna say next, the people who hate howard listen to see what he is gonna say next.  The Last Airbender Fantastisucked, the term has been used by me before look it up in a previous blog if it isn't on here it's on multiply. The last airbender took a cake walk and turned it into a rushed, yet grueling, waste of good martial arts performances, lousy bending but great martial arts.

Wait what? How could it be great martial arts but lousy bending, simply part of the beautiful thing about bending is that your element followed you as you made you motions. If you watched the show it kind of gave you a tactile feel for chi flow as they talk about it in martial arts. Its almost like he only watched Aang bend(not Ong as M night decided he wanted to do its almost like he was making a bad parody of a good show) when he first started learning each of the elements past air(hell his airbending took too damn long).

If you look up avatar the last airbender the cartoon you will see some marked differences, wait let me take that back EARTH BENDING IS THE ONLY BENDING HE GOT SEMI CLOSE. The way he made the earth seem to fight against its benders before it finally bowed to their will was right, everybody elses bending HE SCREWED THE POOCH. First and foremost FIREBENDERS CREATE THEIR OWN FIRE. It is created from their chi, and in all honesty for them it made sense, why might you ask.

Think of the Greek gods for a second, who are the big three Zeus Sky, Poseidon Air, Hades Earth/the underworld. There is of course another fire spirit there Apollo god of the sun. The only really free flowing bit of flame in our little solar system. Whats the funny thing about the sun if it was closer it would scortch us. Thus while we all use fire and admit its value and power we keep it restrained. So Air plentiful, Water plentiful unless you are in the middle of the land, and Earth PLENTIFUL. Those benders would have plenty of their element around them and have free access to it, because in nature those elements are plentiful and usually not too restrained, ESPECIALLY AIR AND EARTH. Fire on the other hand needs so much to get going it needs fuel, it needs air and then you would have to constantly transport it. I mean Their machines run on fire which means they would burn massive amounts of fuel so by the time you made it to an enemies camp you ordinace should be damn near used up. So if as was explained in the show you allowed fire to be created by your chi and your emotions your passion, your anger, you desires then it would be strong bright and free flowing. You wouldn't have to worry about always having fire with you(which would make it hard for you to sneak up on someone and capture them since you would be carrying a damn torch).

What M night should have done was told this story in 6 parts 2 parts per book(the books are Water, Earth and Fire in the order that Aang must learn them to fully master being the avatar) the beginning of each book developing the characters and their abilities showing why they came to the decisions they did and what mistakes made them better benders, tactitians or people.

Okay lets start with story and character errors:

Story error one:How the Avatar was discovered; in the movie there is this big bubble sitting there that Katara hits with a hammer or something and breaks it open and Poof there lays the avatar. Lame because it basically defeats an important part of the story that you will discover later. Katara is a very strong WATER BENDER. In the show you later learn that she is so strong and gifted that she can Heal using water and that she can even bend the water in your Blood.

In the cartoon, Sokka(not Soaka or Souka, the hell there are ways to screw things up and then there are ways to show its just an obstacle in the way of what you really want to do) and his sister are out on the water and they start having an argument. During the course of the argument katara angered by sokka's sophmoric and condescending ways starts screaming and giving in to her emotions while on the raft. As she does not yet realize she is a water bender nor the strength of her bending as Sokka tries to calm her down she gets more insensed she will be heard she will not be shushed and she will not calm down. The water around the craft is reacting to her emotions churning, splashing and during all of these splashes up comes Aang's bubble containing him and Appa, Oppa, or Opa(dunno how its spell but it sounds like Op Ah, Sokka sounds like Sock ah or Socc ah, Katara is Kat ar ah, and and is Ang like in freaking Tang you know the orange drink or freaking WU TANG) as she continues to rage the ice which is also made of water starts to crack. Up shoots a beam of light out fall Aang and Opa and our adventure begins.

Another story error and lets be real about this the races of the characters, they matter in the story and the fact that you whitewashed then tanwashed most of them makes no damn sense. As many have claimed the cartoon does have asian overtones, yes it is a cartoon but the characters are all asian, if you read the signs in the cartoon they are done in Kanji(thus you get subtitles for what is on the doors when you see the signs). Call it a mistake in the artists rendering, call it a minor faux paux call it caucasians do not need to be the focal point of every damn story. But sokka and katara are clearer of a darker hue than Aang, I don't mean an hour in the sun I mean like a month in the sun darker(you know like the girl who comes back after two weeks in the islands and just has to rub her tan in your face even if it just comes from a tanning booth or a spray bottle). And any claims to the contrary are foolish simply because they diminish the importance of being factual to the source material just for personal preference or connection.  Every one in their village and of the water tribes appear to either be Inuit or Eskimo ALL not Most except for Sokka GAM GAM and Katara. As a matter of fact it appeared that every speaking character from the water tribe was caucasian. By the way anybody who claims that the water tribe or earth tribe is in anyway shape or form scandanavian is smoking the same pipe M night smoked to make this movie and think it wasn't going to be a cryingstock(this movie is so sad you cry at what it SHOULD HAVE BEEN). Neither tribes were pale, and the earth kingdom people had slanted eyes and FU MAN CHU mustaches, Fu man chu's not viking beards. And again unless you are saying that both water tribes had a serious case of sunburn(though they were not red) again is an idiot, if you cannot accept a character in a live action movie to be exactly how he was in the cartoon then you know what don't watch either because you can't handle it.

Now the earth tribes APPEARED to be chineses, korean, or mongolian. But the fire benders umm how can I put this nicely They all appeared to be indian(and I mean indian not native american). In the show if you asked me I would have said they were either Mandarin chinese or japanese, by their dress, mannerism and actions. I have heard many laughable denials of the Asiatic base f this story and its sad, because you can tell they are just saying it because while they know better they cannot help their white centric view on how things should look.

They were ALL asians: Inuit waterbenders, Tibetan/Shaolin Airbenders, Korean, Chinese, Mongolian earth benders, and Chinese, Mandarin, Japanese fire benders. It almost looks like it was a representation 3 kingdoms period in china towards the end as was shown in the move Hero staring jet li. Except in avatar they gave each kingdom an element(thus requiring a fourth kingdom) and instead of the fight ending in one huge nation it ends with each nation controlling itself but striving for peace between themselves. Yes each bending style mimiced a martial art air soft style wushu(sort of like snake), water taichi, earth bending hard like tiger or crain, and fire kind of like monkey style lots of flips, kicks and aerial maneuvers. So casting fantastisucked, its almost like he had a cast in mind that he wanted to work on for his next film this became his next film and he used that cast anyway.

Next problem sokka, he's a loveable pest. Again he is somewhat immature, very sophmorice, basically he's a kids version of Ryan Reynolds in any movie he plays in. Yes he's smart, yes he has good ideas he makes jokes all the time, teases but you love him because he's constant. And the journey sokka goes on to become this great strategist and better warrior well I can't see how M nights brooding, sulking, BORING stiff could pull that off. I mean Not ONE JOKE. Unless you count that he's the only one that said KATara's name right. already discussed the name moving on.

Prince Zuko was like prince zuko in the series except his hair was wrong, in the beginning LIKE IN CHINA Zuko ONLY had a pony tail. His sides were bald, he wore his hair up as did IROH(not eroh, the hell with the names Asian saying pffft liar I can look up any other anime and show them saying similar names to these without a freakin problem he has mental problems he screwed it up to screw it up on purpose). Iroh actually had his hair in a sort of courtiers single loop bun like you used to see in old Kung fu movies. Oh and Iroh was fat, I say this not to disrespect the character but to kind of respect who the character was. Iroh was an old general, and he had the body like one, a body that you could tell had seen many years and was starting to go to seed as he stopped the rigors of a strick military life. SO this thin EROH, while he like his tea didn't seem as introspective and comtemplative. I mean technically the cartoon Iroh was FREAKIN CONFUCIUS, he always had words of wisdom and mild mannered yet educational anecdotes to pass on. And he seemed like a man tired of war, he was always trying to cheer zuko up, make him see that there were better things in his future then just being another lackey to his overly ambitious father. There was a bond between Zuko and Iroh that you aren't seeing in this movie. And Iroh's hair what the hell, whats with the I don't know if those were dreads or ratty braids.

Though Zuko's scar, hmmm it should have been the whole side of his face. Yes if you looked closesly parts of the skin look slightly marked from the blistering, but it should have been a big blatant scar not this afterthought that M. Night tried to pull off to make it I guess more kid friendly. And whats with the mispronunciation of asian works its KAI, Agnekai or Agnekai AG NUH KAI. I know asians say Kai all the time because I watch bleach and BAN KAI is when one of the characters takes his ZanPakTo to pretty much its ultimate level, Their swords have a SkiKAI form(which is an unreleased for), a released for(don't remember if that form had a name) and then the BANKAI form. So for M night to have it called Ah Nee Kee the lies for his asian pronunciation keep getting weaker and weaker. We are americans we watch anime, we know what words we hear the ASIAN voice actors say. So if in Hindi, or arabic, or whatever dialect from india that he speaks that he is trying to pass off as asian he should have just said so, cause his words didn't sound REMOTELY asian. I mean they sounded like bad 1950's translations of asian terms and words.

And by the way there are like 2 Agnekai's shown in book 1 water. Agnekais are pretty much Honor battles, and Zuko being so much about Honor these should have been shown, every chance to get even a piece of his honor back zuko would have held firmly too.

Katara getting the waterbending scroll SHE STOLE IT FROM PIRATES. And why were the pirates important, because those same Pirates were the ones used by the admiral from the fire nation that Zuko didn't get along with to attempt to ASSASINATE HIM. Not only that but it wasn't until Book 2 Earth that Aang found out that Zuko was the blue spirit. The complicated relationship between Zuko and Ang, Zuko's quest to regain his honor, Zuko and Iroh, Zuko and Azula and Zuko and firelord Ozai is also sometimes told using the mask of the blue spirit. Admiral Jin didn't Suspect Zuko's treachery until he saw the twin swords zuko likes to use in his uncles bunk.

And AVATAR KYOSHI hello that damn statue is on KYOSHI ISLAND, the land that Sokkas future Girlfriend comes from. The island is the place where an important battle between Aang and Zuko is fought, man just whew. The ignorance of that whole scene and the Speech Aang gave belonged to Katara. It showed you how rumors, messages and stories of the battles against the fire nation have traveled the world. It showed Kataras passion and how she was more then just the bossy younger sister, the one who had dreams of the strong Earth Benders finally overcoming the fire nation.

And where was Aangs playfulness. They weren't making stops on the way to the northern Water tribe to fight battles Aang had a list of goof off side trips he had planned. He still saw the world as it had been 100 years before when there hadn't been a lot of fighting. To make matters worse they allowed Aang to be trapped in a room that was supposed to have a door that ONLY A MASTER AIRBENDER COULD OPEN.

There were rumors that M nights kids made him watch the show, I think he knows how to sleep with his eyes open cause dude. I mean so much is rushed, the characters are so wrong, the constipated way he treated all bending, the botched casting, the holes in the story, the ignorance of the character growth.

I mean the best Water bender did not want to teach Katara because she was a girl, but come to find out she is not just any girl but that necklace she always wears, her pride and joy that Gam Gam gave her, that necklace was made by that great water bender for her grandmother when she was his betrothed, She ran away from the Northern Water tribe because she did not like it's rigid structure. Hell the Princesses father wasn't dead he is the one who held the feast in the AVATARS Honor. He showed them that Magic Garden THAT WAS NOT IN A CAVE, I mean he stole a scene from the cartoon and screwed it up. Those two koi the white with the shiny blackish patch and the black with the shiny/glowy whitish patch circle the MOON in the cartoon it was part of how Aang saw the Yin Yang symbol in the pull and learn to better understand water bendings push and pull. It helped him better connect water bending in his mind. He just through it off in a cave some wear as an afterthought.

Avatar touched on so many adult themes in a way that children could understand them and take notice of them that the fact that a SUPPOSED adult could screw it up so badly. I mean it isn't even a old cartoon that current generation children may have only seen reruns of and possibly out of order, its a freaking current cartoon. It's been getting Marathons with Extra info since a month and a half before The Last Airbender was due to premier. I know it's like I keep harping on the guy but it's almost as if M night wanted to be ridiculed after this movie came out. Like this was his cry for an intervention, its a current story, like Harry Potter EVERYBODY HAS SEEN IT. That's why it got a movie, and instead of taking the lessons from the good harry potter movies it's like he fell in love with the "directorial vision" of the guys who basically had turned the fans off so badly I often wonder if J K Rollings doesn't sometimes say to herself why did I agree to this hack again PUBLICLY! You do not cut improtant MAIN STAY characters out of a story just because they do not fit your directorial vision.

I mean I know I usually say I want to give a movie a chance because some reviewers could care less about the subject matter of a comic/cartoon/adaptation movie such as this, but I hate to say it they are right, this thing has gone so far past Craptastic that it almost has to be viewed just to see how badly Hollywood does not respect our money. Somebody had to show up during the filming of this thing and say, "ummm dude what are you shooting? The death of my profit margin this movie SUUUUCKS."

On Think Hero's Youtube channel he talks about all these pregnant pauses in the movie between lines, and what I'm wondering is were those T bag pauses? I mean was he having the actors pause at those instances to say here, these are my testes I want them all in your mouth for watching this trainwreck of a movie, and actually paying for it. Is this M nights cry for an intervention, has he lost his muse and is just churning out crap until somebody says dude here, this is the good weed, or here this is a project you can actually wrap your brain around to work out the kinks, because this should have been a cake walk. It's not like a comic book movie with a character that has been around for 50 years so there has been a million costume changes, character updates, artists, inkers, adaptations, successes, failures, favorites, most hated. He had the CGI budget(even if Opa's face looked like somebody ripped it off from Where the wild things are) which if all you were looking for was the elements moving around okay the elements moved, but at least to me it looked like it was an afterthought. Like even though this was the entire thing that made them distinctive from other martial artists(and even in the world of Avatar: the last airbender there were other types of martial arts) he still found a way to focus solely on the martial arts and damn near completely try and ignore the powers.

I mean I blame this on Hollywood completely I see a lot of movies lately where they completely ignore what it is we like about the characters to try and tell us some story based on some wet dream they had when they got somebodies money to make a movie. It isn't the subject matter they are trying to bring THEIR VISION to life, to hell with the subject matter without them IT doesn't exist. Yeah well without the viewers your ability to make a sequel doesn't exist.

So yeah once again Fantastisucked, it's a word introduced by marvel in the Ultimate Universe and it DEFINITELY describes this Travesty

Thursday, July 1, 2010

The plan for the weekend

I rarely do this for an important reason:my plans usually get shot quick, I'm talking high noon in the old west quick. But I as usual wanna see if I can write something down and then bring it to fruition.

I plan to go see The Last Airbender M.Night Shamalan's movie based on the cartoon Avatar:The last Airbender. I have always been of the mindset that you will see the doorways into our future with the entertainment the kids watch. Lucas, Roddenberry, Cameron they all grew up on those old flash gordon serials. And look at how far they pushed imagination and movies. And if JJ abrahms Star Trek remake is any indication Roddenberry hasn't done a half bad job of inspiring the future either. Also Animation has really gone to new heights I didn't have a problem with the astroboy movie I thought it was pretty good. DRAGON BALL SUCKED, Speed racer was pretty good. I've done reviews for many of them(Yeah Yeah I owe yall a karate kid review, may have to go watch it again to make sure I don't misrepresent anything) again my review is not like anyone else's I'm not going to say the movie gets X amount of stars did I like it yes or no, why and do I think it's worth the price of admission.

My main problem with professional reviewers is it rarely seems to be about the movie and a lot of times to be about their own personal egos if they couldn't do or imagine better it sucked, if they could Oh it was great. And you'll watch them and basically want your money back because they have no integrity, I remember that old John Lovitz cartoon called the critic lets not say he was making fun of them all but he was making fun of them all and the only movie he liked had really no plot, no story it just followed a balloon around. It was supposed to be an art film but honestly how many of us really want to watch an art film not a drama, or action movie, or comedy? oh well time to make the martini if I feel froggy I'll post on ply or else traipse back here

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