It's just stuff

I'll admit it, I do like my stuff. I'm the oldest and since my little sister was like 3 the concept of me having something of my own was like foreign to me. From the first time she took my toy robot and said "mine" just because while she didn't know why I was playing with it or what distant world me and my mind were on I had made that robot look like the greatest toy on the planet. To me it was, I have a great imagination I may never be satisfied with the way it transfers from my minds eye, through my fingers to whatever medium I am putting it on but that is because my mental pictures are so vivid. Hell even my tongue can't keep up with me half the time and as you see these key strokes and the average length of my submissions I'm sure you think he's exaggerating:but I'm not.

I was piloting that robot off to help han solo and luke skywalker stop the super star destroyer from killing the ewoks. Or maybe I was outside helping scottie get those dilithium crystals stabilized. I never know, my mind races along so fast that if mentally I blink I'm in a whole new world. And it is probably because I'm the oldest and thus subject to sharing my material possessions with every one else that I am so narcissistic about my mental possessions. They have to be perfect because if I am sharing it with you I want you to understand how precious it is and how wonderful.

My mental possessions though are  not the reason I am writing this blog. I lost something today, hell it is mine in name only I had long since bequeathed it to the pot because well my room is not as large as it used to be and honestly my TV would not have fit in here. So while out at a job site returning somebody's computer my LCD tv was cracked. Now anybody who owns an LCD device knows you never know how bad the damage is until you turn it on. And yes it's bad you can't even see anything on the screen it's only one small corner thats cracked but it seems the WHERE is the most important factor in this because instead of being a spiderweb sitting in the middle of the picture we just got a huge web and running flashy color. Now I won't lie 20 years ago I would have been pissed. Pissed actually is an understatement what I paid for that TV when I bought it MAAAAAAN, Remember the lovely Madeline Kahn(I think thats how you spell it) from all those Mel Brooks movies and Clue, clue is the important one in this instance remember how she described the feeling when she found out her husband had been cheating on her. Yeah that and a conniption fit are just the tip of the ice berg of what I would be feeling. Because once again when big brother shared and turned his back for a minute: snap, crick, chink, smash, boom, ZZZZZT, crackle. Oh yes don't think it was just GI Joe's with the Kung Fu grip(okay technically I never owned a REAL GI Joe with said kung fu grip, I had them miniaturized knock offs fine they were the real thing but I wanted the full size one, just like I wanted the millenium falcon or the ORIGINAL Optimus Prime Big rig, granted I'd be doing life right now if I had gotten either of those out the box and I came home to find them broken) I'm a kid of the original analog to digital transition. You ever see pictures of those old apple 2's yep I first started playing on those with all the other grade schoolers. Had an Atari 2600 too, and the 7800(my god sister had the 5200 with the original BIG BRICK CATRIDGES) I have lived through the creation of EVERY gaming generation so far. I never owned ET but I played that in store demo so when I tell you thank god for land fills, trust me I'm not kidding. ET the video game is a level of suck NEVER to be experienced again.

Even The Last Airbender didn't ET the video game us, did he try yes. But as he got SOME things right I can't call him ET the movie maker(but MAN did he try) now that was 20 years ago, that would be about the christmas we rolled home to find our house had been robbed, Happy birthday to me(my birthday is christmas eve yes I share my birthday with the happiest day in every childs life, that day Santa comes to make their dreams come true). We learned quite a few lessons that year. And yes for a while I was the Troll under the bridge, if parents were not around touching my stuff got the evil eye and a swift pop on the hand. Especially if it was something that wasn't age appropriate for you anyway. I think it took for my little brother to start playing baseball for me to be more mellow about my stuff.

Huh why would a sibling playing a sport make you more open with your stuff. It was a Louisevill Slugger 36. I loved it, that bad boy was the first brand new bat I had ever bought for myself all the rest had been from flea markets or yard sales(and hey I will NEVER down flea market bats or yard sale gloves already broken in leather is hard to pass up). So anyway again my brothers would watch me and my friends play and they would see us having fun granted both are double digit years younger than me. But hey older brother and his friends are out there enjoying themselves can we play. Sure whatever go chase the balls when they fly way out.(nice part about my old neighborhood on elm street up the block and over the tracks was a baseball field we actually had two within child transportation level distance ie walking or a bike ride). Now both had basketball courts attached and other enjoyable amenities but the baseball field is the important part. I am a firm believe in playing baseball like you know how to play baseball. Go down to the wire, you can't hit my best pitch, you can't get that over the plate past me baseball.  And thats how I taught it to my brothers, you want me to pitch to you no lobs uh uh your gonna hit a real pitch. And call me a purist but I like WOOD hickory or ash if you please. So there we are J just started his little league older brother went all out, bought 4 brand new balls each weekend so that when we played on the field real leather was flying. So as we are getting ready I pitch to him to let him build up a little arm strength, and being a younger sibling you know what he goes for yup the 'Ville. Dude I love ya given time you MIGHT be taller than me(unfortunately life loves irony scratch might out of there and put in DEFINITELY) but thats is way to much bat for you. He he I can hear life to this day "you of all people are telling YOUR little brother HE CAN'T". I made him a deal he could get a few swings with the hickory and if he couldn't get it around to make CONTACT, he'd pick up the lighter aluminum to continue practicing. I can still see that brightening smile on his face, I was being a douche I knew he wasn't gonna make contact especially on that first day. And no he didn't but the determination he showed(especially as the bat did more swinging of him then he did of it that first time) kinda filled an older brother with pride. I probably should have only given him 1 at bat worth of swings but I let him go ahead and miss 9 pitches(not in a row I've never had that kinda control on my pitches). He got tired picked up the aluminum and made contact with a few.

Now being that he failed of course he would give up right(hey life, I will kick you in the nads, seriously it's been like 18 years or so quit laughing, punk grrr) Nope not my little brother, it took him like 2 or 3 weeks but he made contact. didn't go far but that Thunk! when leather hits wood got him hooked too. Unfortunately I didn't know how hooked he made contact a few times, then he actually started getting dribble hits then decent past the pitchers mound hits(what I told you it's baseball you are either gonna hit a pitch or sit down) I even had some of my friends pitching to him. One day (I worked so I never made his games) I get a phone call the coach would like you to stop letting your little brother bring your bat to the games. PAUSE first off little so and so when you ASK to borrow my bat, second off how the hell did you get so good at putting it back. Problem was this was a few weeks in and before the game where the coach relented LIKE I HAD and decide "Hell let the kid swing the bat, get embarrassed and learn his lesson". Yeah um Coach next time ask me, I would have told you not only can he swing that bat, but unless you got a kid on the other side with an arm like a 16+ year olds he don't stand a CRACK! See the kid I heard tried the slider. Or at least at his age a baby slider, problem is Old J Kirk he loves to throw sliders, and high fastballs (I shall have my revenge, but they are soo pretty). At the time Joel was probably 16 or 17 and J had made connections with a few of his sliders. So not only did he know what a slider looked like he also knew the outcome if he made contact. Even more if he shifted his weight behind the contact, and better still if he got more than just the tip of the bat on the ball.

See the nice thing about aluminum besides that TINK! is that the ball kinda bounces hard off the bat. and the bad thing about aluminum is that the ball bounces hard off the bat. You loose a lot of power making that tink, oh yes all that vibration that means the bat not the ball absorbed a lot of that force. So: young kid throws a slider, and a kid of similar age using a wooden bat and you know what that spells on a kiddie field right, no oh I forgot you pain in the butt sore loser parents changed the game so you wouldn't have to give a pep talk and actually PRACTICE with your kid and share some BONDING TIME. Okay fine THAT ladies and gentleman spells HOME RUN, yes I Mr. High fast ball chaser himself(I'll chase a middle one and an outside one too but as the saying goes "Starts High STAYS high") had told him you see a slider coming lean into it and watch it sail, And sale it did and Lil J was allowed to keep using that wooden bat(though with a noogied shoulder, next time ask BEFORE you borrow my bat) and keep getting those extra base hits. Hmm if I show them how to appreciate my stuff they would take considerably better care of it(that boy kept that bat in good shape while he used it, never had to wipe a lick of dirt off it he was so mad when I broke it, what I swing hard as hell too you know I've broken a few bats in my day). So I decided instead of hoarding MAYBE I should show them the value of taking care of it.

So thats what I started doing, oh it didn't always work out for the best but as they got older they got better. We are still all human beings though and accidents they do happen, so here we are we're all grown and my 5 year old LCD is busted, meh damn needed a new TV  anyway this one was showing its age, yes mildly pissed but the former brat(my baby brother) did call me first himself to let me know, gotta respect that. Off top. unforced. HE called me, second its a TV I can get a newer better one for a quarter of the price I paid for that one. Now he's sulking, which you know okay yeah he's gonna have to shell out some green backs, just not buy himself he has two brothers we ain gonna let the homey go out solo like that.  But again he was a man and spot up when he screwed up, and it's just a TV, hell it was a 5 year old LCD TV those things don't live as long as those old panel TV's did you should read the number of HOURS each of your colors is supposed to be good for, I think most tv's blues are supposed to run out in about 5-6 years worth of use.

So is this about my journey as a person, nope it's about a simple fact, it's just stuff. Something that has traveled a few addresses with me, I've enjoyed my time with and I will have no problem replacing with something newer, shinier and with more bells and whistles. Because a lot of things have and continue to change in this past 5 years, and baby VIVA LA DIFFERENCE