"You will die at the hands of a one legged man"

The sea calm and clear on a moonlit night. Two fisherman pull up their net and find a man, what they think is a drowned man until he gasps for air while saying something in Spanish.  We are whipped to the Spanish court, it seems this man claims to have been aboard the ship of Ponce De Leon, which the men say is impossible because Ponce was lost 200 years ago. But the King looks at the book in the mans hand a orders a close figure to leave immediately for the new world. We are whipped to a courtroom in England a hooded man is being brought to trial. The man Jack Sparrow, pirate, looter, thief he will hang for his crimes against the crown, except when the hood is taken off it's Mr. Gibbs who is pleading the case for him NOT being jack sparrow. All rise, a gloved hand is seen handing a bag of money to a court officer and the Judges name is cried out. Under wig and powder is a familiar face, he questions the NOT Jack Sparrow about the conditions of him being in his presence that afternoon. After being bludgeoned a few times, and the Judge threatening him with another bludgeoning for claiming he could point out the REAL Jack Sparrow the Judge demands a verdict, without a trial. Drooling for their entertainment the court room onlookers scream "Hang im, Hang im" to which upon hearing the guilty "verdict" the Judge says "Mr. Gibbs you have been convicted of the crime of NOT being Jack Sparrow and will be placed imprisoned for the rest of your natural life". The crowd screams bloody murder, they wanted their hanging, they had a pirate in their midst and they expected a throat stretching, aaaah justice how fine she be.

Pirates of the Caribbean:On Stranger Tides

Whosoever holds this Hammer

The Uru Hammer, the original super weapon commissioned by Odin to be built for his heir. Forged in the heart of a dieing star, by the dwarven blacksmiths, infused with the Power of the All Father. And who wields this mighty weapon non other than the Odinson the Mighty

Thor

We open in the norselands upon a Village appear the frost Giants with their mighty weapon the casket. After freezing all the villagers solid and appearing to be on their way to conquer the planet earth and leave it a frozen mass. To help defend planet earth come the Asgardians lead by Odin himself. The war rages all the way back to the Frost giants home world of Jotunheim. The losses on both sides were many but in the end Odin defeats Laufey and takes the frost giants casket.

Make sure you got your FUNderwear on

Look I'm probably botching the hell out of that line, but with the amount of money Fast Five made this weekend  I believe it is safe to say Vin Diesel and crew definitely packed theirs.

Fast Five starts out where "Fast and Furious" ends(you know I wish they would leave the sites for the old movies up, just for us folks who MIGHT want to link to them, just saying) Dominic Toretta is in a court room about to be sentenced to 25 years in jail. though Brian O'connor has spoken up for him and Toretta has helped to bring down a heroin king pin his favorite judge can't wait to throw the book at him. Behind the bus taking Toretta to prison pulls up 3 cars, one driven by his sister Mia, one driven by O'connor, I forget who was driving the 3rd car after pulling a bus escape that would make Reggie Hammond have a flashback they escape from LA and we see Mia and Brian pull up in the 70's Charger in Rio De Janeiro, Brazil.

After the credits rolled

There was:nothing

Yup I stayed after the credits so you didn't have to, it would have been nice if there was something at the end of Tron:legacy but it was a good movie all by itself, blog to come later. Trailer blog and "omw to the movies" blog to come whenever my E-mail posts on the blog's draft section WTF this is like 18 hours late
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